2 Days...

Thursday: As with a lot of mornings lately, I awoke feeling sick to the stomach and struggled to get anything down as breakfast. I was determined to get out for a final pre-race run, leaving tomorrow as a rest day before the race. The new marathon socks were given a test-run, and they felt very good indeed. It was very sunny again, still very cold though, and I did a gentle and easy run, covering 1.38km in 11mins 38secs. The target was to hit the first measureable point after 10mins. I've found the last few runs have actually taken my mind off the race, being in the park has been rather relaxing today. A nice change from feeling stressed about it all, which I have gone back to now. I was on my feet all day, shopping and exchanging training gear (getting the right sizes and so on), plus taxi-ing the family around, and exhausted though I am at the end of the day, at least I have everything for Saturday. I even bought safety pins for pinning my race number to my top, just incase. During the school run, I had an interesting chat with a parent I know is into running. She isn't doing the Salford 5km Run, though hopes to do a race on Sunday (back permitting) and was telling me how she did her first race (without any training) in 32mins (5km), which added to my anxiety, as 3.5months of training has me within touching distance of a pathetic 34mins. I know I shouldn't let targets get to me too much (as some say on fetch.com) but the thought of doing 5km in a rubbish time is just hugely depressing me. I hate to admit, I have already had the first pre-race tears :o( The parent told me I ought to be excited for my first one, that her favourite is the first race she did, and it's something to be treasured. I'm going wrong somewhere because instead of excitement, I want to be physically sick (not happened yet, wish it would though, get it out my system) and I keep breaking down in tears. Maybe being with a club would have helped my nerves, but I doubt it, as it would have been extra pressure to compete with people way out of my league, so maybe small mercies and all that. The kids were asking if they could come see me race, bless them, but I persuaded them to wait and see me race in Edinburgh, as I know the other half's mocking is putting me off right now, and will add to my nervousness if they are there. I'm just hoping I'm going to wake up on Saturday and feel fine, as at the moment, it's incredibly stressful and stomach-churning, just waiting now.